Beer for the Brain

Hands up who’s ever heard of a Simmonds electronic drum kit…they were all the rage in the 1980 ‘s and were set to revolutionise drumming…..our American manager Greg bought Max one…. Max’s old and much loved Hayman Kit was left at home and Greg stood at the front of the stage proudly admiring this new acquisition as Max grumpily bolted the large black plastic pads onto the shiny industrial looking frame..” Hey fella ” …Greg probably said ” that looks real good ”
I won’t go into too many details except to say the gig was at a large hotel in the North west…we had hired a massive PA from London off our friend Pab ( more about him in another blog ) and the gig unfortunately was a vicars and tarts themed party for the hard working staff of the hotel….now this as you can imagine is not really DSB or OS territory and as the gig wore on it became more like a comedy show with me at one point being asked to act as compère and host the judging as to who was the best vicar etc….
We were just getting into the last quarter of the set when it happened …the boom and thud of Max’s electronic kit had stopped and the rest of the band were jerking along without it …Paul did one final flourish on his guitar and then nodded to stop…..roadies came on stage and checked the leads etc…no it wasn’t that and I proclaimed to the audience in a big bombastic voice pointing to the kit as Basil Fawlty had pointed to his broken down car…” Don’t ever buy one of these ” I shouted ” they’re rubbish …we’ve only just bought it” …we slunk off stage and that was that ……fucking electronic drum kits what a waste of money…
It was only the other day that we learnt the truth…” I poured my pint into the brain thing…that’s why it stopped working….” said Max…..
” fucking hell max ” I Said ” why ” ……” Fucking shit gig wasn’t it…it had to be stopped didn’t it “……jeez

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